Well this is my first real journal entry in a while, and I doubt anyone will read it but whatever. I am sick of it all. I have been called inconsiderate by a close friend because I was worried about my own feelings. I NEVER worry about myself. EVER. If she really knew me me that well then she would know that. My girlfriend just broke up with me, and didn't tell me, I had to learn from one of my close friends 2 days later, and I was called inconsiderate because I mentioned that it hurt my feelings that i wasn't told. And she called me inconsiderate! Then she said I was dragging her into it when I defended myself! I am not, and have never been an inconsiderate person. Ever. I was not being inconsiderate, I simply wanted to know why she never told me she wanted to break up. Honestly, I think my friend was being biased because it was her best friend. I knew this would fucking happen too. We would break up, and our friends would take sides and pick a friend to stay friends with. I have done nothing but give to this girl too!! I have done more foir her than I have done for anyone else. I tried not to hurt Devon, and yet I am made out as the bad guy? What the FUCK?!?! How am I getting bitched at for trying to understand my own feelings. I dn't get it. I am hurt too. But she is a girl so she gets special attention? She gets space? I only want to know what I did wrong. I tried to be the best boyfried I could be, even though i wanted to break up for a long time. I tried. Because I am Incoinsiderate. I wanted to let go, to let her move on with somebody better, which she deserved because I was not good enough for her. But I get to be called inconsiderate. I am sorry I didn't try harder. I am sorry I failed. I am the least inconsiderate person that I know. I have never cared about my own feelings. This is the first time I have ever showed any amount of caring for myself, and my feelings. But this time its inconsiderate to care about myself. Why is that? Why can't I care about me? Nobody else is gonna do it. I'm sick of it. All of it. I'm done. I have never cared for myself anyway. I'm not a fun person to be around so who cares? Fuck it. I'm inconsiderate.